One of the most important issues for immigrant families is the weakening of bonds between parents and children. Parents work long hours to support and educate their children, and often times leave their children home alone. These children then make new friends, who become the trendsetters and the ones they look up to. This new environment starts influencing the children more than their parents. These factors can lead to rebellion, pathological behaviors or experimentation with drugs.

Many of these children begin to identify with their U.S. friends and families, while their parents remain in the Polish culture. The clash between cultures lead to confrontations, quarrels, and fights. Parents wonder where they went wrong. Aggression, yelling, and punishment, which rarely bring any positive results, are the wrong paths to improving relationships between parents and their children.

Lack of English skills adds to the isolation of parents in their new environment. Children educated in U.S. schools, learning English and experiencing U.S. culture regularly, assimilate faster than their parents. Eventually, children and their parents become distant and the bond between them is weakened. Conflicts crop up and parents do not know what to do or where to look for help.

Specialists from St. Mark’s Institute for Mental Health clinic, UNITAS,can provide help in such situations. To help Polish families in need, UNITAS’ psychiatrists and therapists have planned a series of open meetings devoted to preventing emotional disturbances and rebuilding bonds between parents and children.

"With this series of meetings we want to highlight the clinic, show where we are located, and what we offer here,” said Dr. Teresa Wandas, a licensed psychologist. “Another important goal is to change the negative opinion, which is so popular among Poles, about seeking mental help.”

UNITAS was established as a psychological clinic to provide help to Polish immigrants. The founder and director of UNITAS, Dr. Roman Pabis, noticed that Poles made up only a small percentage of those who were taking advantage of the clinic’s professional help. The clinic is the only place in New York City where therapeutic sessions are conducted in Polish.

“First and foremost, Polish immigrants do not know about us, and second, they reach for psychological help very reluctantly, as a last resort," said Dr. Pabis.

Some worry that information about obtaining mental help would reach their employers or schools.

"In U.S. culture, contact with a mental health specialist is not a reason to be ashamed; children who have problems adjusting to a new environment are not stigmatized. For us if parents understanding this, it would be a success," added Wandas.

Polish families often come to the clinic too late, making the therapy difficult and long. If a family notices changes in the behavior of their child as well as the weakening of family ties, the needed help can be provided much earlier. UNITAS addresses these issues in their meetings.

"You can avoid many problems if help comes early enough,” said Dr. Malgorzata Witek, a child psychiatrist from the clinic. “We hope that the information provided during the meetings proves helpful. However, our main goal is to bring the parents' attention to the first symptoms in their children and overcome the shame related to asking for help.”

The topics of the meetings are prepared very carefully. The first session focuses on the security of the child, and the role of the parents in shaping it. It tackles the topic of preventive treatment. Parents recognizing situations where their child is in need of getting professional help is discussed during the second meeting. The third meeting will be devoted to conflicts between teenagers and parents. One of the meetings will also discuss the controversial topic of treating emotional disturbances in children and adolescents through medication. The problem of drug addiction in teenagers will be subject of the final meeting. All meetings will be conducted in Polish, medical jargon will not be used, and there will be opportunities for everyone to ask questions.

The specialists who work in UNITAS clinic through this series of meetings want to make Polish immigrants more aware of the large group of Poles in New York City. "Many people in this group struggle with different problems and we want to help them," said Dr. Olga Dobrowolska, a family therapist.

"After more than 10 years of existence we would like to go back to our original mission – helping Polish immigrants – and especially children from those families," said Pabis, adding that a few years back the Polish American Family Institute was founded for that very reason. "We have received some funds for therapy from the Red Cross. Thanks to that we can outreach to children who were affected by the September 11 tragedy. We are optimistic and hope that these meetings will be helpful to Polish families. We are also want to organize similar meetings more often."